AK: The first section in The Ethical Slut is about relationship myths, and all of these myths that society has created around relationships, and I’m wondering what you think are the best ways to open up a discussion around these “foundational” relationship ideals, and how we can possibly start to release ourselves, as a culture, from some of these false ideals?

DE: Well to me, this is kind of a philosophical concept, but the idea of celebrating diversity as a positive force of society is the most important, that everybody brings something really interesting. In sexuality, long-term monogamous relationships have been the gold standard: you know, you started out as two virgins in high school or, depending on your social class, college and you got married and you stayed together until you died. So we had this very monolithic notion of what the best kind of relationship was. I know people who have stayed with horrendous, acting-out alcoholics for fifty years; does that make their relationship great, that it lasted fifty years? Does that make it successful? So, you know, where are we in this? If we celebrate diversity of relationships, it frees everyone to go out and look for the lifestyle they want.